Rejecting Acceptance

I'm trying on acceptance
as if, one day,
it might fit comfortably
like an old sweater,
but this is impossible.
You can't understand
though you might think you can
because the universe or god
or whatever spirit, bright or dark,
that you pray to
didn't forsake you.
You still have the rainbow
that bright arc of color,
you still have the gift of time
that heartless demon.
You can't know this ache
that lives inside me
forcing me to see emptiness,
the setting of my life.
The platitudes of your denial don't apply
I'm alone in this grief, swallowed in it
as the daily turning world abandons me.